Agents of Future

19 09 2008
I recently rediscovered this amazing band that I’ve known of for quite a long time. The more I listen, the more I’m convinced that this is probably the most amazing praise and worship band ever of all time forever. Everyone should go to these two websites:

and download every song you can find (around 60 or so :) ).

Those of you who know me well probably know that I think most modern praise/worship music is utterly banal and irrelevant. I feel that most of it has no energy, reuses/recycles the same tired phrases over and over, and borrows melodies way too often. Sometimes it seems like the performers of said music are just going through the motions and everyone is just trying so hard to lose themselves in worship to God in the music. God made us to be creative people for a reason, so I’m usually frustrated when I see people creating art for God that is so unoriginal and consists of covering other bands’ songs/rearranging other bands’ lyrics and calling it new (“I’m singin’ hallelujah and gettin’ smothered by all these brothers who be stuck on the same page tryin’ to get their hymns played, only playin’ covers”…”If anyone’s in Christ then you a new creation. So then, REFLECT your Creator with origination” – Soul-Junk, “Pumpfake”).

Anyway, enough of why I think that music is bad, and onto why I think Agents of Future’s music is so good. These guys play with passion. It’s often kind of sloppy, it’s not produced perfectly, it’s not always sung on key, but it’s some of the most passionate music I’ve ever heard. It’s completely original, and the lyrics seem like they actually took some thought. From what I’ve read about them, Agents of Future isn’t so much a band as it is a get-together of people who love God and celebrate Him in whatever way they see fit. I’ve read that they have as many as 25 people performing along with them when they play live.

Besides all this, the songs are near-unbearably catchy and stick to your brain like glue. So, even if you’re reading this and you aren’t a Christian, chalk the band up to a bunch of wackos singing to an invisible man in the sky and listen to these songs just for the fact that it’s amazing music.

Since some of the songs are really bad audio quality and some are better than others, here are the songs that are just plain great and must be listened to (I didn’t really expect you to download all 60 songs, silly).


(from the soundclick site [you have to sign up for the site first, it’s not too hard and they don’t harass you with e-mails, just do it, trust me])

Without Strings ( – First song I ever heard by the band on a CD sampler. I listened to this song nonstop for a long time when I first heard it.

Everything (

Like a Child (

UR Who U Say UR ( – This one’s great, insanely catchy- download now.

There is a Name ( – Really great build-up in this song.

I Gave My Lunch ( – Song about the boy who gave his lunch of bread and fishes to Jesus. Beautiful song.

Songs on myspace: well, you can listen for yourself, but I strongly suggest downloading Nothing in the Way and Peace on it’s Feet. Those two are great.

Okay, I’m done now. You might listen to any or all of these songs and say to yourself, “Man, these guys suck,” but at least give them a chance. I think they’re amazing. Listen for yourself, and let me know if you agree. Better yet, let them know on their myspace site.

(I don’t know anyone in this band personally and I’m not getting paid for this, trust me :) )

Demon Utopia? Training for Hunters? Hunter Utopia? Training for Demons?

22 07 2008

I had a sort of revelation recently concerning the band Demon Hunter.  For those of you who don’t know, Demon Hunter is one of the current most famous Christian metal/hardcore band around right now.  Also, for those of you don’t know, band members Don and Ryan Clark, rhythm guitarist and vocalist of Demon Hunter, respectively, were in a band called Training for Utopia before forming Demon Hunter.  They released two full-length albums, an EP, and a split EP with the band Zao.

Now, for those of you who are Demon Hunter fans, please don’t take this blog entry the wrong way.  I think Demon Hunter is a band full of talented musicians who consistently churn out slightly-above-average melodic metal music with occasionally awesome songs.  These are merely observations.

The band Training for Utopia released a song on their final album Throwing a Wrench Into the American Music Machine from 1999 called “50000 Screaming TFU Fans Can’t Be Wrong”.  It was the first song on the album and featured lyrics where the writer complains about not getting the recognition he deserves.  Here are the lyrics to the song:

Training for Utopia- “50000 Screaming TFU Fans Can’t Be Wrong”

Tired of playing
Tired of not being played
Tear this city down
Dance among the flames

Rock is alive and well
Give me all your fame
Some things are not for free
I’m for sale

I’m gonna tear this movement down
Im gonna remain deleted

Been played
Been under payed
You still threw me away

And I want it back


Training for Utopia 

Training for Utopia


Basically, if I’m reading this song right, Ryan Clark dislikes the fact that his band is not as big and famous as he would like (I say “if I’m reading this song right” because there are probably sarcastic overtones in the song that I’m missing).  Note that this band is not a Christian band, however Don and Ryan Clark are themselves Christians.  Also note that this album has nearly no discernible spiritual content, unlike previous albums which had hints of it.  Thirdly, note that Training for Utopia is an extremely innovative noisecore band whose albums each have a distinct feel to them, Throwing being the most innovative since it basically consisted of the album being recorded by the band and then electronically mashed and remixed some guy/thing called Appliance (said to perform “electronic interventions” in the liner notes).

After this album is released, Training for Utopia breaks up… and what comes up out of the ashes?  Demon Hunter, a Christian melodic metal band that wears its influences on its sleeve (Slipknot being a big one, so I’ve heard, I haven’t heard much of them) and is “shrouded in mystery”, as the band members aren’t revealed to the public and the press photos feature some of the band members wearing masks.  Good way to get attention, right?

Fast forward to 2008.  Demon Hunter has released four albums and is one of the biggest Christian heavy bands around.  They do one huge tour per album and usually take three or four other heavy Christian acts with them.  When Don and Ryan Clark aren’t busy with Demon Hunter, they work with their art company Invisible Creature, where they make album art for some of the most famous rock bands around, Christian and non-Christian. 

It seems to me that all of the complaints from that nearly ten-year-old song have been put to rest and its prophecies have been fulfilled.  Let me explain pertinent lines with my comments in italics.

Tired of playing
Tired of not being played
Pretty self-explanatory.  Demon Hunter is definitely getting played.  If that’s not true, then Don and Ryan are getting payed in Invisible Creature.

Rock is alive and well
Give me all your fame
Dude wants fame.  Can’t blame him.  He’s being honest.
Some things are not for free
I’m for sale
Um, I can’t really judge people’s motives, so I’m not going to comment on this one.

I’m gonna tear this movement down
Im gonna remain deleted
Seems the innovative style started by TFU was the beginning of a movement. 
It got torn down when Demon Hunter was formed.

Been played
Been under payed
You still threw me away

And I want it back

Played, under-payed, and thrown away.  This problem will be solved with a new band.

Just some observations :)

(after-note: Remember, I’m not bad-mouthing Don or Ryan Clark.  The parallels between their successes and that song are just interesting to me, is all)

2 Corinthians 5:17

21 07 2008

“Therefore if any man be in Christ, he is a new creature: old things are passed away; behold, all things are become new.”

This verse has caused me a lot of trouble over the years (or maybe I just brought the trouble on myself). I would read it and assume that because my “godliness” hadn’t increased tenfold and all my bad habits didn’t disappear when I “became a Christian” (it could be said I was a Christian all my life, since I grew up in the church) that I (1) wasn’t really a new creature, (2) wasn’t really saved, and (3) was on my way to Hell unless I did something, fast (although what exactly I was supposed to do always escaped me, I had already prayed the “sinner’s prayer” about 50,387 times and I wasn’t sure what else to try).

My Dad’s Bible had a section in the back about how to minister to people effectively called “Guide to Christian Workers.” Ironically, a certain section in it served more than just about anything else to make my Christianity a living Hell at times. It was in the section titled “Convincement” meant to convince the new believer that they were actually saved (more irony). It was in the third subsection of this and was entitled THERE IS A NEW IMAGE. Anyway, it starts out with the 2 Cor. 5:17 verse (actually, I didn’t even remember that it did until a minute ago when I looked it up in my Dad’s Bible). It emboldens and italicizes the words he is which is irony in itself (I’ll explain later). Anyway, this is what the rest of this section says (forgive me if I’m breaking any copyright laws):

“A New Testament Christian is not a patched-up job, a reformed sinner. There is a new will; there are new affections; there is a new purpose because there is a new nature.”

Here’s the kicker:

“The emptiest and unhappiest occupation in the world is trying to act like a Christian when you are not a Christian. You do not gradually stop stealing. You stop stealing. It is miracle, not magic.”

Wow. Let’s break this down. This is what I was thinking:
“I’m extremely unhappy and empty because I fear that I’m not really saved. I look to this little Christian worker’s guide to help give me assurance. I read that once you are saved, you instantly stop sinning habitually. I am still dealing with many sins and sinful habits in my life. I must not really be saved. If you are not really saved, then you go to Hell forever and ever. I’m screwed… unless I do something NOW. I’ve already prayed to God/Jesus numerous times to save me from my sins and forgive me and come to live in my heart. What else can I do? I must not be trying hard enough. I must not believe enough. Maybe I’m one of the people who isn’t meant to be saved.”

Okay, maybe I never thought that last sentence, but it lurked in the back of my mind, mostly because I was too afraid to think it. These thoughts tormented me for most of my teenage life. I probably already mentioned this somewhere in one of my other notes, but I would get caught in a cycle of doubt salvation/become terrified of Hell/get help from pastor or friends or family/be reassured/doubt salvation…

What I didn’t realize up until about a year ago was that there was nothing I could do to be saved. You can pray the sinner’s prayer all day and not have a single thing change in your life. You can will yourself to be sincere all you want, but sincerity will not save you. You can truly be seeking and even want Jesus in your life (which I did. Believe me, I did), but unless God chooses to bless you with a personal experience with Him, nothing will happen. You can’t force it. God alone is the One Who chooses when you will be brought to the point where you will truly cry out for Him from the depths of your soul.

Terrible memories are coming back as I write this. NO WONDER I was so doubtful. NO WONDER I couldn’t trust God like I wanted to. NO WONDER I couldn’t believe with childlike faith. Any childlike faith I might have had was perverted by reading wonderful “Christian Guides” like this. One cannot believe with simplicity with the fear of Hell and separation and death and torture hanging over their heads (by the way, there is no separation in the commonly held view of Hell. If you hold to the Eternal Separation view over the Eternal Torture view, read Revelation 14:10. The “torment” in Hell happens in the presence of the Lamb. There is no separation from the Lamb, He’s right there). If praying the sinner’s prayer and trying not to sin and trying to love people and trying to focus on reading the Bible and trying to enjoy and learn from church are not enough to escape Hell, THEN WHAT IS? I tried so many things! Luke 18:22 says that the rich young ruler lacked one thing… maybe it was also what I was lacking. Maybe I had to sell all that I had and give to the poor. I never did that and had no real desire to do it unless I felt God was calling me to do that. But maybe I just had to do it and the fact that I wouldn’t was keeping me from fully experiencing salvation. (I’m sure those who wrote the Christian Guide had done that [sarcasm]). Nothing I tried was working and giving me the assurance I needed. According to my guide, God only works in one way, and if you aren’t saved in this one specific way (excessively detailed by the author[s]), then you’re probably not really saved and had better do something about it.

Okay, now where was I… oh right:
“Therefore if any man be in Christ, he is a new creature: old things are passed away; behold, all things are become new.”

The italicized words in the King James version are words that are not actually in the original text. They are added in to make the text more readable and understandable for the English speaker/reader. In other words, the italicized words “be” and “he is” are not actually part of the verse. Remember when I told you that the author(s) of my Christian guide emboldened the words “he is?” Funny they would try to emphasize that part of the verse, when it’s not actually part of it in the first place. In my particular (King James) version of the Bible, there is a (1) before the words he is which refers to a footnote. This footnote says “Or, let him be.” In other words, the verse could also be read as:

“Therefore if any man be in Christ, let him be a new creature: old things are passed away; behold, all things are become new.”

Hmmm, puts a bit of a different twist on the verse, doesn’t it? Could it be that instead of us automatically being completely cured of our sinful ways, this verse is calling us to make the qualities of this “new creature” become a part of us? Is it telling us to rely on God so that in our new Christian lives it will be that “old things are passed away… [and] … all things are become new?” Perhaps this verse means that it will not be easy to do such a thing, but that we must strive (not completely by ourselves, relying on God is absolutely necessary) to get rid of the qualities of the old creature?

Don’t get me wrong, I know there are people who, once becoming saved, really are immediately transformed and seem to give up very many of the sinful habits they’ve had previously, and I think that’s wonderful. Does that mean that this is how God works with everyone? A thousand times no! What of those who have been raised in the evangelical church system for their entire lives and have been “good little boys and girls,” with nary a public sin to be spoken of? What of those who were “saved” when they were five years old because their parent or pastor led them in a prayer and as adults are no longer sure of what they believe? What of those who live with a pharisaical spirit, who think that God is on their side (and only on their side) and everyone else is doomed? What of Muslims/Jews/etc. who live perfectly moral lives and love others more than the majority of Christians do? What happens when these people are saved? None of these people seem like they have any sin that needs curing. God works in different ways with different people. Some He will change gradually, others instantly, some won’t seem to change at all, but God is still working in all of them.

Like I’ve said before, I’ve been “saved” most of my life, and had my “real salvation experience” at the age of 13 at a Christian speaking/music event. I remember shortly after that, I was very excited about God and I would look at the people around me and see sadness in their eyes. I wished that there were something that I could do to help them and show them love. But I never did. I was soon caught up in pharisaical thinking and the mindset of “I have to do this, this, and this and can’t do this, this, and this or I’m not really saved” and forgot about other people. Only in the past year or so have I begun to get back the love for people that I felt shortly after I was “saved,” and that was only after I abandoned the pharisaical, exclusionary way of thinking and the fear of Hell that had burdened me for most of my life.

Well, this note was only supposed to be a couple paragraphs about the verse, but it turned out that I wrote a lot more than I planned on. Oh well, I hope whoever reads this gets something out of it. I’ll close with the lyrics to a song by Michael W. Smith (words by Wayne Kirkpatrick) called “Calling Heaven”:

Calling heaven
Seeking mercy
Tell me there’s a place for these

What of the children who have never felt a love
Tender as the morning
Nursing the bruises
And the scars that never seem to go away

What of the babies who have never left the womb
Breathing in the lifeline
Angels in waiting
Gone before they could be given wings to fly


What of the noble who are searching for the truth
With truest of intentions
And yet they’re jaded by
Hypocrisies behind cathedral walls

What of the humble and the meek that knew despair
And never got their moment
But sacrificed a life of comfort
So that others knew no pain


What of the ones who call you Lord
But play the field
with faithless indecision
Forgive us father for we truly
Do not know what we have done


(originally written 7/3/08 )

It’s funny…

21 07 2008
“but nothing unifies like a common enemy
and we’ve got one, sure as hell
but he may be living in your house
he may be raising up your kids
he may be sleeping with your wife
oh no, he may not look like you think”
-Derek Webb, “A King and a Kingdom”

I really fail at practicing what I preach. This poor girl went to Vintage all alone, sat by herself, and no one talked to her. She looked so sad. Myself, being an incredibly nice guy, felt like someone should go and talk to her / make her feel welcome. So, I did what any other decent person would do and actually did: nothing. It’s not the first time, either. In the past few times I’ve gone to Vintage, the same thing has happened with two other people, both guys. They seemed to come by themselves, sat by themselves, wandered aimlessly around by themselves. Those times, I also did what any decent person would do: absolutely nothing. You’d think a guy who spent the better part of his life wishing he had friends and that people would talk to him would be more likely to go out of his way to be nice to people. Nope. I could’ve encouraged these people and shown them love, but I let my fear of rejection and my shyness take over, instead of not worrying about that stuff and doing what I should have.

“If this is all the love my spirit can give
There is not a reason more to live”
-Demon Hunter, “The Tide Began to Rise”

But you know what? How many other people (loving Christians) were there? I realize that I’m no better than they are for not doing anything, but I wonder, was I the only one who even noticed? Why is it that we can talk ’til we’re blue in the face about being loving to others, but can’t take enough time to break out of our stupid cliques and show love to someone who needs it? Do we (I) not have enough love? What can I do to get it? How can I get to the point where I don’t care about the consequences and will just do what I feel is right?

I’ve failed to make a difference in someone’s life. I could have shown God’s love, but stifled it. I could have said a kind word, but held it in. I could have been the hands and feet of Christ, but chose to stay little, insecure me.

What the hell is my problem?

“It’s funny how chemo wears you down.
It’s funny when the lame dog is put down.
It’s funny when it is taken out into the street and is shot.”
-Spitfire, “Chemo Therapist”

(originally written 6/4/08 )


21 07 2008
Right here.

Needs to stop thinking about juggling these incandescent thoughts.

Courage doesn’t become some people (and probably never will).

Postmodernism? Not exactly.

Use that grey matter your Heavenly Father blessed you with.

Push them away.

“Burn it down and walk away.”

Not much use in forcing it.

Repent of your bitter cynicism, it’s driving you into the ground.

Who is being addressed?

Keep being vague, nothing gets solved that way.

“Give us more desperation / isolation, because it works for me.”

Basket case.

Once a basket case, always a basket case?

It doesn’t make sense in the given context.

Walk in the room.

Turn on the charm.

Bask in the warm glow of adulation as the masses shift their attention in zero seconds flat.

Seeing oneself as a martyr can easily become the height of arrogance.

Just do as you feel led.

Dr. Weyandt’s words still haunt me.

Where is this all going?

Utter destruction?

Complete and total bliss?

A possible lifetime of isolation traded for what?

To conform and lose one’s heart / soul / spirit / passion, or forge a new path and be fed to the wolves?

Have you washed yourself in the rain? I ask as I wallow in my cesspool of filth.

We’re all hypocrites.

Do we really want what we say we desire?

Which one of you holds the ultimate truth?

Certainly it can’t be all of you.

I refuse to praise Him for saving *me* anymore.

It’s not about me.

If anyone is unworthy, it’s not the atheist, it’s not the Muslim, it’s not the Hindu, it’s not the Christian Scientist, it’s not the Satanist.

It’s me. (Is this the height of arrogance or humility?)

The hypocritical “Christian” who refused to see the good in other people.

I don’t care who you are.

You’re on this journey with me.

It’s not me against the world.

It’s not you against the world.

It’s not *us* against the world.

Stop pushing. Stop fighting it. Stop being desperate.

Stop seeing others as hopeless. Only then can we learn to love them.

Satan, the Devil, our “free will”, “The prince of the power of the air”, our sinful natures, our refusal to listen, our outright denial, our hatred, our self-righteousness, our condemning natures, our sickening pleasure at the retribution of the wicked, our failure to “repeat this prayer after me,” even our outright refusal of His forgiveness.

Which of these will stop the unlimited, unconditional, unfailing love of God?

The initial cynical rant has turned into praise to God. How did that happen?

God works in mysterious ways, friend :).

Lord, I praise and thank You for saving *us*.

(originally written 5/4/08 )

When are we going to start believing what we’re singing?

21 07 2008
[Introductory note: I’ve spent too many years ashamed of my Christianity. Quite frankly, I’m tired of it. After seven years of being a Christian (well twenty-one, if your definition of being a Christian is going to church and doing what you’re told), living in defeat, and wishing God would just make me perfect, bold, and fearless, in Spring / Summer 2007 I finally found what’s been holding me back so long. It’s going to be a long process to get where I need to be in my walk with God, but I’m ready (I hope / think) to do whatever it takes to get to that point. I’m sick of hiding my joy and gratitude. I’m going to tell the world (well, whoever reads this note, you know what I mean) about how great I believe my God is. I don’t care about consequences or what I may be labeled as, by Christians or non-Christians. “Whatever happens, happens.”]

I love the following three songs because I think they communicate really well how much God really loves us. I think the writers of these songs inadvertently express the witness that each of us has inside us of the true, unfailing, never-ceasing love of God. Pay special attention to the lyrics I’ve underlined.

Third Day- “Love Song”

Well I’ve heard it said, that a man would climb a mountain
Just to be with the one he loves
How many times has he broken that promise
It has never been done.
Well, I never climbed the highest mountain
But I walked the hill of calvary

And just to be with you, I would do anything
There’s no price I would not pay, no.
And just to be with you, I would give everything
And I would give my life away, yeah__.

And I’ve heard it said that a man would swim the oceans
Just to be with the one he loves.
But all of those dreams, are an empty emotion.
It can never be done.
Well, I never swam the deepest ocean
But I walked upon the raging sea.

And just to be with you, I would do anything
There’s no price I would not pay, no.
And just to be with you, I would give everything
And I would give my life away. Yeah___.

And I know that you don’t understand
the fullness of My love
How I died upon the cross for your sin.
And I know that you don’t realize
how much that I give you
And I promise, well I would do it all again.

And just to be with you, I’ve done everything
There’s no price I did not pay, no.
And just to be with you, I gave everything
Yes, I gave My life away, yeah___.
I gave My life away, yeah

And just to be with you.
Oh, just to be with you.
Oh, just to be with you.
Oh, just to be with you.

Jesus would give it all again if it were necessary. He will go to any length to bring all of His children home. That is what I read in this song by the modern evangelical Christian rock band, Third Day (which I’m quite fond of at times). How does this line up with what we are being taught by the majority of the modern church? What a simple, childlike faith is expressed in this song! If we truly believed this, what joy would fill our hearts! Alright, let’s move on to the next song before I get ahead of myself…

Third Day- “I’ve Always Loved You”

I don’t know how to explain it
But I know that words will hardly do
Miracles with signs and wonders
Aren’t enough for me to prove to you

Don’t you know I’ve always loved you
Even before there was time
Though you turn away
I’ll tell you still
Don’t you know I’ve always loved you
And I always will

Greater love has not a man
Than the one who gives his life to prove
That he would do anything
And that’s what I’m going to do for you

Another song by Third Day… this one is also told from God’s point of view. He’s always loved us… and He ALWAYS will. Oh, if only I’d known this seven / eight years ago! So many years of fear could have been avoided had I only believed in God’s love like a little child. But you know what? I’m glad I went through those years of my life. They’ve helped me to appreciate and understand His love all the more. What a perfect God! What a perfect plan! He will do anything to bring His beloved sons and daughters (for whom he died) home again to him.

Disciple- “After the World”

You break the glass, try to hide your face
Recorded lines that just will not erase
And buried in your loss of innocence
You wonder if you’ll find it again

Was I there for the worst of all your pain?
And was I there when your blue sky ran away?
Was I there when the rains were flooding you?
I hope you feel those were My tears falling down for you, falling down for you

I’m the One that you’ve been looking for
I’m the One that you’ve been waiting for
I’ve had My eyes on you ever since you were born
I will love you after the rain falls down
I will love you after the sun goes out
I’ll have My eyes on you after the world is no more

Did I arrange the light of your first day?
Did I create the rhythm your heart makes?
Could you believe when your candle starts to fade?
I want to be the One that you believe
Could take it all away, take your heart away

Isn’t My life a clear sign since I have crossed over this chasm
To fill the space between Me and you?
And I will do it all over again
Just look for Me, just wait for Me

The One you’ve been looking for
The One you’ve been waiting for
You won’t have to look anymore

I remember reading a review of the CD that this song came out on in Relevant Magazine. It said something like, “‘After the World’ is probably the greatest song this band has ever written.” I think I’m starting to agree with them. The song says in the first verse, “Was I there when the rains were flooding you?… those were My tears falling down for you.” Wait, what? God’s tears? He cries for us? I thought all He saw when He looked at the struggling, squirming sinners was a big sign on their heads marked “GUILTY”. Praise God, He CRIES for us, He empathizes with us, He has sympathy for us. He longs for us to be with Him, and even though all will work out for our (and His) good, our suffering means so much to Him that He feels our sorrow.

He will love us even after the END OF THE WORLD. How great is that? He doesn’t limit His love to the 70 or so years we have in these physical bodies. He loves us for WHO WE ARE, our spirits and our souls.

I’ve been hearing a lot lately about the “bridge illustration” which is used as a witnessing tool for Christians to tell people about Christ’s love. There are two cliffs, one on either side. One is called spiritual sickness, or death, and the other is called spiritual health, or life. We are on the death side and God is on the life side, and the Cross of Christ serves as a bridge between the two sides, so that we can go to be with God.

The reason I mention all that is because this line from the song reminded me of it: “I have crossed over this chasm to fill the space between Me and you”. It then goes on to say that He will do it again. We don’t go to God to get saved. He comes to us! We can do nothing, I repeat, NOTHING, to get to God. That includes saying a magical prayer (believe me I’ve tried, hundreds of times), doing the right thing (again, hundreds of times), or abstaining from destructive sins (yeah, I’ve tried that one too, many times, doesn’t really work out too well when you try all by yourself). GOD CROSSES THE CHASM AND BRINGS US TO THE OTHER SIDE! But don’t we have any sort of choice, you ask? Yes, but you can only make that “choice” because God engineered your circumstances so that you can see Him for Who He is and accept Him. In other words, it happens in God’s time, not ours.

Another illustration I really like is this: A man has fallen into a pit. All these different religious people such as Muhammed, the Buddha, Vishnu, L. Ron Hubbard, Jim Jones (alright I’ll stop)… give the man advice on how to get out of the pit according to their religious beliefs. Of course, they give him this advice as they look down at him from above the pit, and then go on their merry way. The man tries to take some of their advice, but nothing works. Eventually he gives in to despair and just sits at the bottom of the pit in misery, waiting for death. After a while, he hears footsteps approaching, but he doesn’t even care enough to call out for help. He then looks up, expecting to see another person passing by who can’t help him. Instead, he sees what appears to be a very poor, rough-looking man at the top of the pit. He doesn’t say a word, but climbs in the pit, down to where the man is, and lifts him out of it. That rough-looking man was Jesus.

I’ve sort of drifted way off from the original purpose of my note, but I guess the main point is this: I am glad to have finally found out the true love of God and will seek to build my trust and love for Him everyday. I can’t wait to rejoice with exceeding great joy with ALL of my brothers and sisters for all He has done for us. Praise God for His unfailing love!

(originally written 4/17/08 )


21 07 2008
Indie music is for popular people.

Join the revolution! Be a part of the mass uprising! Be different like the rest of us! Forsake your identity!


Ibidibideebopbopbow. Woo! Yeah.

You know what I’m talking about, spoonfed children.

The charity case slowly runs out of reasons to care.

Does it read angry? It’s not meant to. Go back into your holes.

Forsake the longing for oneness with the world.

Get by as best you can.

Crawl out of the corner and take your place in line.

“men are wondering to get by,
floor, stairwell
should i try?”

Try to find meaning, I dare you.

Jack has gone free, you’ll find him someday.

It’s raining. The sand is getting soaked. This isn’t so fun anymore.

Climb out of the muck and wash yourself in the rain.

Let’s drop the pretentiousness and masturbatory, ego-stroking verboseness (there I go again).

Dr. Weyandt puts it better than I ever could:

“I’m racing racing towards it
Like when I was a small boy
Cutting through a waving field
Decorated by summer sunlight
Unable to remember
Unable to forget
Unaware yet at peace
Unaware yet scared
I’m racing racing towards it with fear and excitement
They seem unseperable
They seem so far apart
They are my close friends
They are my very ghosts
I’m racing towards it
Holding perfectly still
In the race of standing still”

(originally written 4/12/08 )